Variations on a Theme

You know how some weeks you're very focused, and others you're all over the place?  This week has been one of the latter for me.  I'm not sure if the tedium of winter is to blame, but what the heck, why not place the blame at the feet of Mother Nature, that icy snow queen. 

Thanks to the non-stop winter storms we've had here in the Northeast, lately I've spent an inordinate amount of time in my car.  Just yesterday morning it took me almost two hours to go 10 miles!  Some of the time I have Mateo along with me, but after I drop him off, I usually have a minimum of 30 minutes (on a good day) of driving to do to get to work.  When he's along for the ride we usually spend the time singing or talking (Me: Look at the snow!  Mateo:  Mamama. Ball. Uh-oh. AHHHHHH!) - but once I'm alone, I switch between NPR and a variety of music stations.  Which leads me to the random list of thoughts I've recently had while stuck on the highways and streets of Greater Hartford:

1. Is Ke$ha a theologian disguised in hotpants?  I tend to think so because her new song not only states that she has Jesus on her neck-a-lace, but the refrain of "We are who we are," is pretty darn close to "I Am Who I Am."  (Which is a variation of YHWH in Hebrew, which is Yahweh, which is another name for, say it with me, God.) 
2. Am I really supposed to believe that scientists can devise an experiment that proves that prairie dogs have the language skills to communicate differences between colors and sizes?  I want to believe, and yet...
3. If I had to choose a member of the opposing party to sit with at the State of Union, under normal circumstances it would be Olympia Snowe, but her name strikes a little too close home at the moment.
4. I wonder if any of my childhood friends remember the trend in 6th grade to come to school with frozen hair...  (I tried to leave the house with my hair wet so that it would freeze on my walk to school, but of course my mother put a stop to that immediately, thereby rendering me so uncool, and pneumonia free.)
5. Is it Steve Inskeep or Steven Skeep?  Is it Mara Liason or Mar Aliason? 

Let me know if you have the answers to any of these burning, burning questions. 

Word to Your Madre

There were a few words and phrases in my childhood home that were absolutely forbidden.  Aside from the normal ban on cursing, the word "sucks," and using "God" inappropriately, under no circumstances were my sister and I ever to say "shut up."  As a sixth grader, I was quite certain that I was amongst the oppressed people of the earth because of my parents' firm stance on this phrase.  It's not that I necessarily wanted to tell my parents to shut up, but on occasion, (sorry Deborah), I really wanted to tell my sister to zip it in less than polite terms.  My mother, however, was determined that ours would be a household where polite behavior was not reserved just for strangers and elders.  And thus, telling anyone to "shut up," even my little sister, was completely unacceptable.

I've thought about this a lot the past week given the uproar our country has been in over civility (or the lack thereof) in our political discourse, and as I mentioned last week, the re-wording of Huck Finn.  No matter what your political persuasion, it's clear that we all care deeply about words.  Some of us care more about the freedom to use them however we see fit, and others of us care more about content -but the bottom line is that we imbue words with power.

Now that I am the parent of a child on the precipice of talking, I feel like I now am even more aware of words and what they mean.  I hope to teach Mateo to use his words in a way that is respectful, thoughtful and civil.  Part of that learning curve, as my parents showed me by the shut up ban, is that for those values to take hold in the public sphere, they have to be practiced at home.  Or, as President Obama so eloquently said in Tucson, "how we treat one another is entirely up to us."

To that, I say word.  And Mateo says ball.

Schmuck Finn

There isn't much politically that Geno and I disagree on, except for the intricacies of the freedom of speech.  Generally I'm all for it, even when I find the speech to be horrible, hateful and disagreeable.  Generally Geno is for it too, except for when it inches too close to being racist, sexist and hateful speech; then he wants the perps put on lock down.  (Please note that I'm not down with hate speech, but seem to have a higher threshold for the ugly than he does.)  This has made for some very lively kitchen table debates over the years.

Imagine then, my surprise, when I found myself not being outraged by the recent revisions Prof. Alan Gribben made to Mark Twain's classic, "Adventures of Huckleberry Finn."  Gribben went through the book, and changed all 219 mentions of the n-word to slave.  It's not that I think it's necessarily a good idea, but for a book that is one of the most frequently banned in schools and libraries, I wonder if this new version might create the opportunity for youth to read it that otherwise might not do so.  It's too early to tell if high schools that would not allow the original "Huck Finn" to be taught in their classrooms will embrace this new version, but I just keep on wondering if it's a possibility.  (The caveat I'd like to throw out there, however, is that any teaching of this book absolutely should address the issues of slavery and racism, and the historical attitudes towards both.)

I think that perhaps my new found tolerance for what many are calling censorship, is that while this is a freedom of speech issue, it also feels like a question of compromise.  The older I get, the more I see facets of life that require us to give up something in order to move towards a larger goal.  Believe me, I can be hardheaded and even strident when it comes to some of my beliefs, but aren't there some times when you have to tiptoe out onto that slippery slope, despite the risk? 

Discuss amongst yourselves...

10 Months

One of the inspirations for starting my blog was reading my friend Beth's husband's cousin's wife's blog.  Got that?  Jill chronicles her adventures with her daughter, Edie, who is now a toddler.  (Check her out at: Jill's Daily Note.)  One of the best features of Jill's blog is her monthly letter to Edie, in which she describes Edie's developments and changes in the past month.  So, now having paid my due respects to Jill, I'd like to copy her concept and write a little ode to a certain 10 month old I know.

Querido Mateo,

Can you say mamadadapapababawawa?  Yes, yes you can.  I'm not sure that any of these "words" are actually connected to people or objects yet, but it is so fun to hear you say mama.  (In fact, it seems to be your sounds of choice to serenade me with on our daily drive to Abuela's house.) 

This month has been huge for you in terms of your physical and social development.  After almost two months of crawling backwards and sideways, you finally figured forward out.  So exciting!  We have had to do a lot of baby proofing now that you can accurately get from Point A to Point B, but it's so worth it.  You can barely contain your excitement as you crawl towards us, leaving only a trail of drool behind you as you go.  We don't expect it to be long before you're walking, as you love to pull yourself up on anything you can get hold of and seem to think you can already take steps on your own.  (You recently got your first bruise, due in part to taking a step that caught us all by surprise.) 

Here you are playing with you brother from another mother, Savanh.

Teething also continues to be a regular part of each week.  I swear those teeth are popping out all over!  So far you have 7 that have completely come in, but 3 more are currently in the works.  As a result, you now have to wear a bib basically all day long, or you would be soaked in drool.  It's also made for some interesting choices in things you like to gnaw on.  (Books seem to be your number one choice.)  Having so many teeth is good though, because you are really getting into chewing your food.  It won't be long before you're eating corn on the cob, I'm certain of it.

Socially, you've really blossomed this month.  If Whole Foods were ever to hire greeters a la Walmart, yours would be the first application they would receive.  You love going to the grocery store and smiling/laughing at everyone you see.  Other stores and restaurants are fun too, but there's something about the grocery store and sheer numbers of people that makes you squeal with delight.  On the flip side, however, you've now started with the age-appropriate development of separation anxiety, which means squeals of non-delight when I leave the room.  (Part of me finds this really endearing, but part of me finds it deafening.)

Check out that smile and those teeth!

This month was also such a fun time for you with family.  In mid-December we celebrated ThanksChristmaKuh with all the Ayalas, and you got to go on a very cool train ride to the "North Pole." (Where we all, including you, contracted a mild form of the plague.  But boy was that train fun!)  Then in late December, your Grandpa Mike and Grandma Mary came to Connecticut to celebrate Christmas with us.  You had a ton of fun getting to see your grandparents in 3D (as opposed to the 2D of Skype), and even got to spend time with all your grandparents at once.  What a lucky boy!

Now you're on to your second calendar year (from 2010 to 2011), and in a few short months will turn the big 0-1.  Can you believe it?!  Me neither.

I love you sweetheart,
Mami